Your Sacred Space

Posted on July 23, 2015 by sstyves

IMG_0205

IMG_0206
Summer is my preferred season. I find the pace slows and I see life through different eyes. I think better and find my way inside of myself in ways that heal and affirm life decisions. Everything whispers I Am and I Am here. Sights, smells, tastes, sounds, and touch awaken the body in holy ways. What better than the splash of colour in a flower garden to stimulate our sense of beauty? The sandy beach beneath your toes glimpses heaven. The taste of ice cream on a scorching hot day delights. The sound of waves crashing on the shore calms. Even the hot dog vendors on the street corners can bring a smile as the smell of their food wafts through the air. Ah, Summer, how I adore thee!

Retreatants in the Spiritual Exercises are taught to set the place of prayer with discernment. This will be a constant in the weeks of the hour-long prayer sessions. Summer also invites me to a sacred place and it is the beach. Here serenity seeps into my skin, relaxing every fiber of my body, releasing all the stress that I carry, and renewing my spirit.
IMG_0219

IMG_0231
Peace,

Suzanne

Reflection Questions
Where is a sacred space that eases you into prayer, where you can see God in all things?
What does it take for you to shed your stress?

Prayer
Blessed are You, O God,
Who creates space for us
to rest and rejuvenate
Blessed are You, Holy One,
Who slips serenely into our souls
and bathes them with delight and wonder.
Blessed are You, Creator of the universe,
for spending time decorating our world
with sacredness that stills us.
Blessed are You, Beloved,
for whispering our names in all places
so that we may glimpse the Divine
Everywhere.

Amen.

Posted in #Consolation, #prayer, Catholic, Christian, Faith, Ignatian, Spirituality | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Jesus, Friend of Women

Posted on July 22, 2015 by sstyves

IMG_9888
Mary Magdelene’s Feast Day brings back memories of a friend’s wedding when I was asked to give a toast to the bride. I am sure people thought it was odd that I would liken her to a woman many think to be a former prostitute but I knew my friend’s heart and I knew she was a true friend of Christ’s who loved him dearly.

Mary Magdelene was a faithful follow of Jesus who after his death was the first to see him and to bear witness to the resurrection. In the recent mini-series AD: The Bible Continues Mary Magdelene is a strong woman who guides men like Peter into making wise decisions. I am sure she learned much being a beloved friend of Jesus. We can see in that television series the fruits of her relationship with him in how she lives out her life after he ascends to heaven. She is challenging and wise, gentle and caring.

Knowing Jesus as a friend, as a woman, brings hope and courage. When I look at Mary Magdalene, I know that my many sins are forgiven. I see her great gratitude and know that she is a model for living with a heart full of praise and thanks. She reminds me that I need to spread the Good News that Christ is risen and very much alive. His redeeming power working in us allows us to bear much fruit. His mercy and love transform us into creatures that can praise, honour and serve him.

I love that Jesus reached out to Mary and healed her. She was seen by many as unclean and untouchable yet he did not hesitate to see what really resided in her heart and to bless her with the task of being the first person to see him after his death. In her pain and grief, he immediately consoles her by appearing as she weeps alone in his tomb. Where are the others this Easter morning? She encounters two angels who without a word point her to Christ. As she turns and sees him, she does not recognize him until he calls her by name. What joy must have coursed through her! What amazement and wonder she must have felt to be the first to proclaim: I have seen the Lord! and to share their encounter with the others. Jesus could have chosen anyone to appear to first. He chose to reveal the Truth of what had happened first to this forgiven woman who he called friend. What a blessing for all of us women who love Jesus too.

Peace,

Suzanne

Reflection Questions
Jesus often chooses the least likely to help proclaim the Good News. How is Jesus asking you to be his messenger?
What kind of friend is Jesus for you? How does being in relationship with Christ transform you?

Prayer

Jesus, Friend of Women,
I am so grateful that you love me.
Our relationship brings out the best in me
as you call forth my gifts and heal my brokenness.
Your forgiveness and mercy inspire me to be
a vessel of your generosity and love.
Make me a disciple who delights
in bringing the Good News to all I meet.

Amen.

Posted in #BibleStories, #prayer, Catholic, Christian, Faith, Ignatian, Spirituality | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Beach Glass

Posted on July 21, 2015 by sstyves

IMG_0228
When I worked at Sojourners Magazine many moons ago, on occasion I would sort through a box of books that authors sent for review and stumbled upon what I considered a gem: A Season of Mercy by Martha Manning. The author explains that the story is about finding God in loss and sorrow. I have used her image of sea or beach glass in a number of bereavement workshops, talks and rituals over the decades. I remember one summer several of us collected beach glass from all over the world for a national hospice and palliative care conference being held here for a ritual for participants.

The Manning story is about a woman who has miscarried and meets Sophia, a wise old sage who says she is the Keeper of the Lighthouse. She comes to her in a dream, dressed in a yellow slicker while they both walk along a beach. As they walk along, all the pent up emotions from losing her baby explode and find release. They talk about the beach, storms, and sorrow. At one point, Sophia bends down and picks up a piece of green, opaque sea glass. She explains the treasure in her hand.

I have long collected beach glass from around the world and the explanation is dear to me. Today as I walked along the beach, feeling consoled and warmed by the Son, my eyes searched out this jewel, as I recalled the essence of the story. Beach glass comes from something that was once whole and beautiful but is then broken and discarded. Its edges are sharp and can wound. Through the power of the sea, the dangerous jagged edges are polished and crystallized. What was once rejected has now a beauty of its own. What once was broken is now a desired gem, a collector’s delight. Like pain and sorrow, the glass has transformed into an object of beauty. If it is a piece of true sea glass, it will taste like tears because of the salt water. This is the wonder of sea glass. This is the Ignatian secret of finding God in all things, too. God uses everything to reveal God’s mercy and love for us.

The interesting thing about sea glass is that it is often stronger than it was originally. It no longer shatters as easily in its new form. This new creation does not come without a great cost. Only those of us who know the price see the richness as it sparkles on a shoreline. As Manning says at the end of her story: And in that moment the transformation is complete. The sea’s sorrow becomes the child’s joy and that is the mercy of God.

As I walked along the shore today, I knew God’s mercy as I picked up this treasure. My illness and surgery will transform me into a new creation. My tears of sorrow will be a treasured part of who I am. I am stronger and more confident in God’s hands than ever before. I trust God in new ways. I am ever grateful for a Saviour who walked along that beach with me today–the same One who wheeled me into the operating room, sat by my bedside as I recovered, and continues to keep an arm around my shoulder as we amble side by side into the future. The Spirit, Sophia, the Keeper of the Lighthouse, accompanies us on the way. I am definitely in good hands.

Peace,

Suzanne

Reflection Questions

What sorrow has been transformed into a treasure in your life?
Do you recognize the new creation you have become and the gift of this brokenness?

Prayer
Sophia, Sage of the Ages,
Keeper of the Lighthouse
You shine on our path
so that we may find
what has been lost.
Transform our brokenness
into beauty and wonder.
Sophia, Spirit of Creation,
thank you for your healing presence
in the stories of our lives.

Amen.

Posted in #CancerSurvivor, #Consolation, #Desolation, #Miracles, #prayer, Catholic, Christian, Faith, Ignatian, Spirituality | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Keep Still

Posted on July 20, 2015 by sstyves

IMG_9901

No signs will be given today from Jesus. Nope, not one. Sit in the belly of the whale like Jonah and wait. Jesus was three days and three nights in the heart of the earth. This passage from Matthew 12 is harsh but as I look to the First Reading from Exodus 14, I understand it differently. Moses tells the people to not be afraid and to stand firm. God will deliver the people that day; they will not perish in the wilderness. Furthermore, Moses says that the Lord will fight for them; they just have to keep still. This is the scene just before he splits the Red Sea.

I am finding it hard to keep still these days. I do not rest well nor, it seems, do I listen well. I tried to book into a retreat centre for next week but it is full all summer, except for when I am away. That is unfortunate for me. I then tried looking at retreat centres on Vancouver Island thinking I want to go to Victoria perhaps but that did not pan out either. I am thinking it might be a good thing to retreat prior to returning to work but maybe God is trying to tell me something else.

This afternoon I went for a hike by myself to see if that would help me keep still. Camera in hand, I also wanted to see if I might be able to walk a good distance yet. As I ambled along, taking photos, I quickly realized that I had not put on bug spray and that was going to be an issue. I kept going though. I slowed slightly as I always do when I have my photographer lens on. For the first part of the walk I was calm. The path was pretty empty. I could hear people at one point. I saw a pile of droppings and thought to myself that it was not bear poop. I walked a bit further, now too far along to turn around, and did see what I knew was bear scat that seemed fairly fresh. Sigh. So much for keeping still. I picked up my pace and started praying my litany of names on my prayer list out loud.

I thought of St. Catherine of Laboure who said that the protection of God is always there. I think it would be ironic that I survive surgery and cancer just to be killed by a bear. I am now swatting mosquitoes and think about West Nile disease. I wonder why I am losing my stillness in such a bizarre fashion. Breathe, I tell myself. God who is good all the time has this too. Do not be afraid. Stand firm. God will fight for me and I just have to stand still….or play dead maybe in this scenario? What funny tricks the mind plays on us sometimes.

Peace,

Suzanne

Reflection Questions

How do you keep still in times of stress?
What chips away at your calm and shatters your stillness?

Prayer

You are a God
brilliant enough to part seas
yet I still sometimes struggle
to see that you are more than capable
of taking care of details.
Your plan does not look much
like mine most days
and I think that is a
very good thing.
Thank you, God, for
having everything under control
even when I do not see it.

Amen.

Posted in #BibleStories, #Miracles, #prayer, Catholic, Christian, Faith, Spirituality | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Rest A While

Posted on July 19, 2015 by sstyves

IMG_0087
I have had an interesting time responding to people who do not know that I am sick. Still as busy as ever? gets answered with Not at all. People are used to seeing me whirl around madly, I suppose. The truth of the matter is that I had slowed down previously to getting really tired last fall. I was trying to clear my schedule for more me time and was somewhat successful. The days still zipped by but the pace was different. Just before starting this blog, I wrote a list of a daily to-do list for the next while:

Pray
Blog
Walk/Exercise
Clean something/one chore
Rest

I laughed at that list because I thought it seemed ambitious. I wanted to add read somewhere but knew that might bump something else off the list and I really do need to do some cleaning around here. Today I self-cleaned the oven. That was quite the feat on a Sabbath but a chore I have wanted to do for months. I am fighting the urge to go full steam ahead. The dietician that I met with last week said to start with 10 minutes of exercise a day for a few weeks prior to returning to any classes at the Pilates studio where I used to go. I thought she was not giving me enough credit but it turns out she is right. I picked up my kettle bell last night and was shocked at how little strength I had in my arms.

Most of the people in my life are busy. We crave action. We forget that even Jesus took a time out when he needed to. Are we more of the Messiah than Christ himself? Should we not take care of our bodies, minds and spirits? Today’s Gospel from Mark 6 shows that Jesus counsels his Apostles who have returned from their mission to come away to a deserted place all by themselves and rest a while. They had done their task and after reporting to Jesus all that they had done and taught, he did not order them to go back out there and save the world. Rather, he saw the masses coming and recommended they go and recharge their batteries. Mark does not have them protest; he says they went away in a boat to a deserted place as suggested.

There is always something to do, someone to help, and somewhere to go. As followers of Jesus our hearts, like Christ’s will be filled with compassion, but the lesson that Jesus gives us today is that we must discern what we need too and then choose between two goods–helping others or caring for ourselves. We do no one else any good if we are tired and cranky or exhausted and distracted. Yes, there will be times when pushing past the fatigue is God’s will but clearly Jesus shows us that we cannot run on empty. Go alone to a quiet place and seek rest for a while. There is no shame in this. Once we have done this, we can be a bright light, and not a dim flicker, for Christ.

Peace,

Suzanne

Reflection Questions

Why do I let myself run on empty? What am I looking for when I do this?
What does a quiet place by myself look like for me?

Prayer

Holy One,
You are ever our Guide
showing us the path in which to walk.
Help us to see that being busy is not always wise.
Slow us down to find a quiet place
to rest a while and know You there.
Service and silence are both sacred.
May we learn a balanced way of being.
Thank you for modeling self-care
as well as compassion for others.

Amen.

Posted in #BibleStories, #CancerSurvivor, #prayer, Catholic, Christian, Faith, Spirituality | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Cured All

Posted on July 18, 2015 by sstyves

IMG_0085
The Gospel today is from Matthew 12 and mentions that many crowds followed Jesus and he cured all of them but told them not to make him known. I honestly do not know what to do with such words. My own journey these past months has seemed miraculous. So many people prayed for me and I know that these intercessions were heard and answered. The surgeon was able to remove my cancerous tumour and the margins and nodes are clear. I had not expected such amazing news. I have found great consolation in knowing that God has been ever-present throughout this ordeal. God has been the Great Physician.

I struggle still with knowing that not all sick people are cured despite the many prayers lifted. All may be healed but cured is not always the case. I have a number of friends who have cancer and have had much more challenging issues like chemotherapy and radiation to endure than me. I know that I have kept them in my prayers as have others but not all were not given an easy walk. I suppose many would argue that my walk is far from easy either. We often do not see our struggles as being as hard as someone else’s. If Jesus can cure all, then why does that not happen? The answer is beyond my reach I believe.

Having said that, I think each of us are given the task of healing and curing others too. There are lots of hurt people in our world. Whether it is a young man who opens fire in a church or at a storefront, or a man who sends letter bombs, or a neighbour who beats her children, hurt people hurt people. Each of us have to take responsibility for making this world a better place, for planting seeds of hope and joy, and for binding up the wounds whenever we can. I think of a young woman I visited in jail for several months. She has not been in touch much since getting out but I know that it is not easy for her. She is broken at her core. I hate to think she cannot be whole again. I wonder though if healing is in her future or if it is too late for her to make different choices. She is so mired in desolation that she does not truly recognize God in anything around her for any length of time. I want to believe in a miracle for her though.

I come back to what Jesus did. He cured all. He did not prevent religious differences from healing others. He did not stop at skin colour, gender, or age. Jesus does not keep score. He does not tally our sins and say that we have reached our limit. He does not give up on us. His desire is for us to be free. What if each one of us helps on that mission? Suppose we make a commitment to not judge the broken ones, to be kind to the ones that seem mean-spirited, and to love those who are least deserving of holding our hearts? What would our world look like if each of us tried this for 24 hours, a week, a month? Would we be cured in the process too?

Peace,

Suzanne

Reflection Questions

How can you be a light to a broken person today?
Where are you in need of a cure?

Prayer

Great Physician,
we are a wounded people
who have fallen and who
struggle to get up on our own
May we find a helping hand
when we need one
and be a steady grasp when
we encounter one in need.
Help us to be agents of
Your love and mercy
so that our world
can rid itself of pain.

Amen.

Posted in #BibleStories, #CancerSurvivor, #Consolation, #Desolation, #Miracles, #prayer, Catholic, Christian, Faith, Ignatian, Spirituality | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Friendship Medicine

Posted on July 17, 2015 by sstyves

IMG_0078
At the end of the daily readings today was this quote from St. Aelred of Rievaulx:

Friendship heightens the joys of prosperity and mitigates the sorrows of adversity by dividing and sharing them. Hence, the best medicine in life is a friend.

I thought I might search out a few more quotes by this saint and found this:

No medicine is more valuable, none more efficacious, none better suited to the cure of all our temporal ills than a friend to whom we may turn for consolation in time of trouble, and with whom we may share our happiness in time of joy.

During my life I have been abundantly blessed by amazing friends. These past seven months or so, I have come to recognize once again how friends uphold me in the good times and on the rough seas. As I reflect back on these months, I am humbled that relationships have taken on a deeper, more meaningful status. I cannot fully explain the generosity and vulnerability of some people in my life. I have never really been able to do so for some relationships but even more so now. I often feel unworthy of the love that is extended though I know that I too am a loyal and generous friend. The ones who have cured my ills during these months are earthly angels and great sources of Ignatian consolation–of keeping my eyes on God through their deeds and words. The best medicine has been my friends during my illness and recovery; they have been much better than any pain pill.

I am grateful for family members who have stood by me at great cost too. The journey was not an easy one and as I move to more stable ground, I know there are many thank yous left to express. I have only begun to scratch the surface of extending my gratitude. The people who have accompanied me to tests and appointments, the ones who have brought food, the pray-ers who have kept my soul surrounded, and the listeners who have not asked me to move to a safer place but allowed me to say whatever has been on my mind and heart are part of a large network that heightened the joys of prosperity and mitigated the sorrows of adversity.

The joy that is in my heart because of people who came through for me is hard to articulate. I will be forever grateful for them. I have said prayers of thanksgiving in the form of a novena for weeks. I still lift them up daily in prayer. My remarkable recovery is in part their doing. Their balm has been valuable and efficacious.

A couple of people have not done so well in the litmus paper test of adversity. I am unsure of what this means long term. This does not apply to the friends who have said that they are sorry they have not been there for me because by this admission they tell me they have been present in their hearts but they have not been able to in a more tangible way. I know that cancer scares and paralyzes people. These are not the ones I am thinking about here. I am more spending time considering the ones who always take and cannot give back. When I was well and able, I was their friend but when I faced my trials, they made a conscious decision not to be there for me. Stephanie Erickson, who I used to quote during my bereavement talks, states that grief changes your address book. I think so does adversity. People who chose not to support someone who asks for their support is a bitter and costly pill to swallow. Now that I am getting back on my feet again, I will have to consider where this type of personality will fit into my life. In thinking about them thus far, I see that the relationships bring desolation and pull me away from God. I then ask myself why I would continue them.

The fact is though that this small number cannot steal the blessings of the friends I have. The relationships that have deepened over the past few months are a pure gift. The adversity has pulled people with huge hearts towards me to minister to me. I am well aware of the fact that I feel like I have taken much more than I have given and am keeping an eye on that. I know it will be more mutual once I am in a less fragile place. I am practicing self-compassion around my self-absorption these days. I am happy to have so many to share my joys with right now.

Peace,

Suzanne

Reflection Questions

Who is a friend who heightens the joy and mitigates the sorrows in your life?
Are there friends in your life who do not do this? What role do they play instead?

Prayer

Jesus, Perfect Friend
Show us how to be like you
Ready to lay down our lives
for those in need,
desiring to share the sorrows
and embrace the joys.
Let us be good medicine
to those who need us,
healing, restoring, reviving.

Amen.

Posted in #CancerSurvivor, #Consolation, #Desolation, #Miracles, #prayer, Catholic, Christian, Faith, Ignatian, Spirituality | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Weary Wonderings

Posted on July 16, 2015 by sstyves

IMG_0090
The Gospel from Matthew 11:28-30 is a balm to my soul. It seems to appear just when I need the reminder to rest again, to hand my burdens to the Yoke-Bearer, and to learn a valuable lesson. I came to Jesus today a number of times but mostly in Adoration. I went to the chapel that has 24-hour Adoration again today and the time passed so quickly that I stayed much longer than I had expected. I went home and took a nap.

Jesus invites us to come when we are weary and carrying heavy burdens and He will give us rest. That was true today as I offered up my physical fatigue. I also placed within His Sacred Heart two relationships in need of healing. One is on the mend; the other I suddenly realized that I may not wish to re-establish. That burden seemed gone today.

Prior to going to the chapel I had an appointment with a dietician at CancerCare. We talked for over an hour. I only had a few questions upon my arrival but the dialogue was great and affirming. It did my heart good to listen to her. She did much more than counsel me about eating habits and dietary needs. She is the second person to say that I may feel tired for a year before I start to feel “normal” again. I think I am making a remarkable recovery and yet on days like today I realize I cannot yet quite carry on a full day of activities without crashing. These are the times that I have to say whoa! That is a challenging restriction for someone who usually carries on like the Energizer bunny. I am learning from Jesus who needed to take breaks, retreat to a silent place, and fall asleep at snatched moments in places like boats where he could rejuvenate. Jesus teaches me that I do not need to be a superwoman. If I yoke myself to Jesus, the burden will be light.

Peace,

Suzanne

Reflection Questions

What heavy burden are you carrying right now?
What can Jesus teach you to help you manage it?

Prayer

Jesus, yoke me to you
for I do not even have the energy
to ask you to do so
I do not need a magic wand
to make everything better
I simply need to surrender to you
You who are gentle and humble of heart
will teach me a better way
Yoke me to you
My burden will be lifted
My soul will find rest
Thank you, Yoke-Bearer.

Amen.

Posted in #BibleStories, #CancerSurvivor, #Consolation, #Miracles, #prayer, Catholic, Christian, Faith, Ignatian, Spirituality | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Come No Closer!

Posted on July 15, 2015 by sstyves

IMG_9516
In Exodus today we hear the well-known story of Moses and the burning bush. God beckons to Moses from the bush and Moses readily answers with Here I am. God then instructs him–Come no closer! Remove the sandals from our feet, for the place on which you are standing is holy ground. God reminds Moses who is speaking–the God of his ancestors, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. This same God has noticed how oppressed the people are and wants to send Moses to free his people. Moses replies with feelings of inadequacies: Who am I?

We can feel so inferior to the calling with which God presents us. You want me to do what? Oh dear, the Maker of the Universe must have me confused with someone else. We do not trust that God is delegating wisely. Surely, not I Lord? echoes in our heads. The not-enough tapes are on a loop again–I am not good enough, strong enough, smart enough, worthy enough, fast enough, old enough, young enough, thin enough, sexy enough, funny enough….I am simply not enough for the task.

When did we forget that the Maker of the Universe created all things good? We are good enough. If God is calling us to the job, the situation is already taken care of. God has it. Why can I not believe it to be so? God sees with eyes of wisdom and knows who is the perfect candidate to send. This does not mean we are perfect; it means that in our weakness God is strong. I envision us wanting to march up to God and demand to know: What were you thinking?! Maybe that is why God says, Come no closer! a more contemporary version might be back off, my friend! I know exactly what I am doing. Remove your shoes and chill. You are on holy ground. You are standing vulnerable and scared but I know that this task is for you alone. You are exactly what I need.

We move quickly into desolation when we go to that not-enough space. We argue with God that we cannot possibly do the mission assigned. We step away from the holy work designed just for us and in doing so, move away from God. We deny the sacred skills God has entrusted to us specifically. Here is where the Darkness can creep into our souls and torment us.

Like George Bailey in It’s A Wonderful Life, we have no idea how our lives impact those around us. Who am I? I am a Child of God, a miracle in the making, a blessing to those around me, an answer to a prayer, and a trustworthy servant. Come no closer with your excuses. Leave them to be extinguished in the burning bush and instead come running, arms wide open, heart freely given, to the One who says You are more than enough with Me.

Peace,

Suzanne

Reflection Questions

What not-enough tape is looped into your brain or psyche? Can you throw it into the burning bush?
Consider an example of how God used you to impact someone else in a positive way.

Prayer

Maker of the Universe
You have made all things good
including me, even me, especially me
Help me to believe this with all of my being
Use me to make a miracle, bring a blessing,
answer a prayer, heal a hurt
Show me how I am enough,
more than enough
through You who sets our world on fire
Maker of the Universe,
Let me not come close to you
with my doubts and inadequacies
Rather let me run to you with my Yes!
Let me serve you with joy and wonder
Today and each day.

Amen.

Posted in #BibleStories, #Desolation, #prayer, Catholic, Christian, Faith, Ignatian, Spirituality | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Birds of a Feather

Posted on July 14, 2015 by sstyves

IMG_0195

Do you still have friends from high school? Junior high school? Elementary school? Are there birds of a feather that still flock together? Recently I was at a funeral for a friend’s father. I had known this friend for decades and had spent some time with her and her dad when she was in last month to say her goodbyes. At the funeral, I had arranged to meet another friend who I have known since Grade 1. I was not in the same class as her but we met on the playground and we have stayed in touch ever since. How blessed are we that our lives remain intertwined!

Last month, when my friend was in town to see her dad, a few of us who had also known each other since elementary school managed to meet up for a last minute meeting. Next week, some of us from junior high will reunite for our annual get together as one of the guys we went to school with returns home. He was the valedictorian of our graduating class. We usually do some fun walk down memory lane. These are the people who helped shape me. The relationships formed were the first forage into vulnerability and loyalty. I, like the butterfly I wrote about yesterday, found a safe place to land in these early friendships.

I was an excruciatingly shy child, with a speech impediment that sparked some bullying, but amongst the girls who I still see, I discovered that I was likeable and a good friend. All these years later, I still find them to be some of the most caring and compassionate people I know. They have grown into fine folks. Many of us have had our crosses to bear–marriage struggles, deaths of loved ones, illnesses, mental illness–and yet we are for the most part, still standing. In fact, we are strong and faith-filled people. The years have revealed our childhood demons that were top secret when we were young. We have wrestled with the things that happened; the road has not always been easy for all of us. We can speak more freely of the issues now than when we were in high school where the weight of them might have crushed us.

Secrets at some point need to be told though for healing to happen. Today I went for a pedicure and the woman who owns the shop and I on occasion fall into deep conversation. Today was one of those days. We ended up talking about our health. She was one of the honest people who said to me about a month after my surgery that I did not look great. She asked what was wrong. She could see in my eyes that the spark had dimmed and discomfort was wreaking havoc for me. As soon as she saw me this afternoon, she asked how I was. My response was so much better than the last time you saw me! She began to share her story of chronic pain and the decision she made to fight back. I think often the Evil One lurks around looking for a crack to get into a soul and destroy it. Chronic pain is one of these ways. We shared our stories and I marveled at how this shy little girl has grown into a woman who can share in a vulnerable manner. I told her my butterfly story and she blessed me, saying that God would transform me and that I in turn, would transform others by telling my story.

God has transformed not only that flock I found in my early years but also that girl who was afraid to talk to people. She soars to heights unimaginable now. I am ever so grateful and blessed by the friends who created a safe place for me and taught me how to be someone who was more than I thought possible. Their presence in my life continues to inspire and encourage me.

Peace,

Suzanne

Reflection Questions

Do you have friendships that span decades? What friend in particular are you grateful for and why?
How have your relationships transformed you?

Prayer

You, O Lord, model friendship
You teach us how to love
with hearts wide open
souls celebrating
You-disguised-in-us
You plant seeds
that last a lifetime,
that heal and bless
that free us from bonds
You, O Lord,
create relationships
that spark a
Divine plan
for which we are ever grateful.

Amen.

Posted in #prayer, Catholic, Christian, Faith, Spirituality | Tagged , , , | 4 Comments