Who knew that resting could be so hard? I have been out of hospital just two days and this is the time I find the hardest. I should be asleep but I am not. These first moments of trying to get comfortable in bed are challenging. My afternoon nap is so much easier. I sometimes think perhaps if I gave up the nap, I would sleep fine but I doubt it. Now is when my body feels the weight of the day’s work–get up out of bed, make breakfast, walk, rest, rest, breathe, drink fluids, read Scripture of the day, rest some more, and then begin to think about lunch.
I know people want to visit but I am still placing limits on people coming by until I feel more comfortable and less tired. Being socially engaged is not particularly restful at this point and so I thank you for your patience as I practice loving myself as my neighbour. I am still needing to carve out boundaries in this recovery process, especially because I apparently look and sound great. My energy though surprisingly high needs to be preserved. I know you will be patient with me.
Tonight I am going to try to sleep on the couch instead of a bed. My naps are usually deep and restful here. We will see if I can replicate them for overnight sleep. I am not doing a lot during the days but they seem to fly by until this time. This morning was bright and sunny and I began the day by taking a walk around the garden where I am staying. This was a soul-filled experience of great beauty and a fantastic beginning to my day. From the photo, one can see that the surroundings are idyllic and exactly what one needs after all I have been through.
Now I am turning off and heading to bed with the hopes of a deep and restorative sleep.